Blog Every Day in January Day 30: All the Ways to Freak Out

I'm staying in the house alone tonight, and I have to say--I'm freaking out a little bit. It's just me and my dog, and I get really paranoid when its like dark and quiet and there are no other humans around. I have a feeling I'll be sleeping with as many lights on as possible and the TV on a low volume.

Last September when I went to Mt. Gretna with my sister and our friends, we stayed in this awesome cabin which was in a really beautiful area. Somehow I wound up sleeping in this tiny window-less room in the basement right next to the garage, and it was in this small separate hallway that was very quiet. I was so scared that I had to sleep with the door fully open and the hallway light on. I don't know if I even really slept that night, because I was so scared. When my sister came to check on me that night, I let out an actual shriek because I thought she was a murderer. Cabin in the woods? In a tiny room in the basement?? No thanks.

Also, I keep thinking about this stupid scary story that I always tell that is really supposed to be funny, but the more I think about it the more effed up it sounds. Basically this girl is staying at home alone even though her parents were like "ARE YOU SURE?" and she's all "YEAH MAN I GOT A DOG" and throughout the night she wakes up and gets freaked out, and reaches under the bed to feel her dog lick her hand to know she's safe. Only she gets so freaked out that she finally goes to check for something and she finds her dog's severed head with a note that says "PEOPLE CAN LICK TOO" and IT'S STARTING TO FEEL A LITTLE TOO REAL. Except I would never let Hickory lick my hand because his mouth is disgusting.

There is no moral of the story here. I'm going to go to bed thinking about serial killers and wake up approximately twenty times tonight. I mean, I'm 21 freaking years old and I've lived in a single dorm room on an empty floor. THAT should have been scary. Our custodian was a creeper. Why is this so much scarier??

I think the worst part is that when I do wake up thinking that there is a serial killer in the house, my instinct will be to go back to bed and hope he kills me while I am asleep. Is that a rational reaction??

And now I'm paranoid that by posting about this someone will see it and be like OOH SOMEONE'S HOME ALONE SOUNDS LIKE A GOOD NIGHT FOR A MURDER. Like, this blog isn't private. THERE ARE SOME REAL CREEPY FREAKS OUT THERE.

YOU STAY AWAY FROM MY HOUSE, YOU CRAZIES. DON'T COME HERE, MY DOG WILL LICK YOU AND HIS MOUTH IS DISGUSTING.